Reidy1987 Posted February 2, 2003 Report Share Posted February 2, 2003 1. That Volkswagen advert. "I'm so sorry, I've brought it back. I shouldn't have let you sell it to me so cheap". f**k OFF!!! IF YOUR CARS ARE CHEAP JUST SAY SO!!! 2. On a similar vein, those Skoda adverts. "Honest, it's a Skoda". f**k OFF!!! IF YOUR CARS ARE CRAP JUST SAY SO!!! 3. That Halifax advert with the ugly black guy who has been transformed into a cute wee cartoon character. Sorry, you're STILL an ugly wee b*****d. 4. Tesco. If they think that stupid old woman is going to make me rush out and shop at Tesco, they are sadly mistaken. 5. Fiat. "Don't you want me? Whoa, whoa, whoa whoa". Keep driving doll, he's a tosser. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tennant's Lager Posted February 3, 2003 Report Share Posted February 3, 2003 In reverse order... 5. Reidy's Volkswagen advert. Who the f**k would ever act in such a mongofied manner? 4. Any advert for a JML product - the cheapness of the adverts makes me just switch off completely. 3. Rangers Direct - need I say any more than "F*CK OFF!" ? 2. Shades Blinds - always repeated two/3 times in quick succession for maximum annoyance, as if three squeaky mice who need flattened don't get on your tits enough already! 1. Ronseal - "It does exactly what it says on the tin". Note to advertisers: IF IT DIDN'T, THEN YOU'D BREACH THE F*CKIN TRADE DESCRIPTIONS ACT! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rank Badjin Posted February 3, 2003 Report Share Posted February 3, 2003 Andie McDowell's eye wrinkle cream Any of those for 'part works' - I mean the Catherine Cookson Collection who in their right mind, The Minature Teapot Collection - wtf? etc, etc Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stu Posted February 3, 2003 Report Share Posted February 3, 2003 Any advert for a company offering to give you aloan so you can "turn all your debts into one managable monthly payment". Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bill Lees Posted February 3, 2003 Report Share Posted February 3, 2003 1. Double glazing company advertised by a shouting be-mulleted weirdo with a broad Lancashire accent . 2. Trailers for other TV progs repeated ad nauseam - is it just me, or are there more of these than ever on TV now ? 3. The Halifax ads - couldn't agree more. 4. Don't live a little - live a Lotto. 5. Werther's Originals. and one I actually like ...... "Think carefully, now, where exactly did you bury the car ? " "In the sand !" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest SWLNG Posted February 3, 2003 Report Share Posted February 3, 2003 Any advert for a company offering to give you aloan so you can "turn all your debts into one managable monthly payment". Some of the acting in those adverts is fecking hilarious. Even funnier is,'INSURANCE COSTS? STUPID,JUST STUPID!' Then the old posh woman loading her kids into the car for the school run adds,'Whennn do I have time to shop for car insurance?' Answer: As soon as the kids go to school and you spend the rest of the day sitting on your fat arse watching Kilroy and Trisha the telly,you old tart. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Radford 72 Posted February 3, 2003 Report Share Posted February 3, 2003 "Have you had an accident at work... John stepped on a bit of wood so sued the tree-cutters for £22,000" Severe tit pain caused by that one. Cheers, Kev Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sergie's no1 fan Posted February 4, 2003 Report Share Posted February 4, 2003 you just have to laugh at them , Betty fell off a ladder and got £8000 compensation Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ST SID Posted February 4, 2003 Report Share Posted February 4, 2003 1. That s***e impersonator advertising the BBC's Xmas TV line up - not funny and never f'k'n off the telly 2. That seatbelt advice ad where the schoolie crushes his maws skull - also not funny 3. Captain Birdseye - clearly a kiddyfiddler 4. "A finger of fudge is just enough to give the kids a treat" - As above 5. The Milky Bar Kid - just want to smash his speccy face in Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sergie's no1 fan Posted February 4, 2003 Report Share Posted February 4, 2003 1. That s***e impersonator advertising the BBC's Xmas TV line up - not funny and never f'k'n off the telly2. That seatbelt advice ad where the schoolie crushes his maws skull - also not funny 3. Captain Birdseye - clearly a kiddyfiddler 4. "A finger of fudge is just enough to give the kids a treat" - As above 5. The Milky Bar Kid - just want to smash his speccy face in ive always thought that Captain Birdseye was a cradle snatcher Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest bob_mcshug Posted February 4, 2003 Report Share Posted February 4, 2003 1. Any red bull advert - they piss me right off!! 2. The coca cola advert with the old boy who's wife has "moved in with eric from the bridge club". 3. the halifax ads 4. not really adverts but those stupid clips they show on ITV now with various TV presenters and this stupid elevator music in the background. I'm sure there were many more but i can't think of them just now!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Reidy1987 Posted February 4, 2003 Author Report Share Posted February 4, 2003 Of course being stuck in thehoose all day I have had the "privilege" of seeing some of those day-time adverts... 1. Thora Hird selling stairlifts 2. Sir John Stalker selling roller shutters and awnings 3. Those adverts for walk-in baths (how the feck do they work???) 4. Life insurance for "over 50s" - "a free carraige clock and no salesman will call" 5. Adjustable beds and chairs and wee electric scooters for folk who can't get about so well... SHRIEEEEEEEKKKK!!! GET ME OUT OF HERE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bill Lees Posted February 4, 2003 Report Share Posted February 4, 2003 Yeah, I've wondered that - surely when you open the door to walk into the bath all the water will pour out ? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ST SID Posted February 4, 2003 Report Share Posted February 4, 2003 Yeah, I've wondered that - surely when you open the door to walk into the bath all the water will pour out ? Decompression chamber Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Reidy1987 Posted February 4, 2003 Author Report Share Posted February 4, 2003 Yeah, I've wondered that - surely when you open the door to walk into the bath all the water will pour out ? And why do they ALWAYS wear a swimsuit? I mean who the feck wears a swimsuit to take a bath??? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ST SID Posted February 4, 2003 Report Share Posted February 4, 2003 And why do they ALWAYS wear a swimsuit? I mean who the feck wears a swimsuit to take a bath??? If your into that sort of thing try this link: http://www.granniestartan.com Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bill Lees Posted February 4, 2003 Report Share Posted February 4, 2003 And why do they ALWAYS wear a swimsuit? I mean who the feck wears a swimsuit to take a bath??? I suppose it's to spare you the sight of wrinkled dangly bits flapping around as the oldies clamber into the walk-in barf..... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest SWLNG Posted February 4, 2003 Report Share Posted February 4, 2003 4. not really adverts but those stupid clips they show on ITV now with various TV presenters and this stupid elevator music in the background. Is that the ones where the presenter just stands still,smiling as the cameraman walks round them? The Graham Speirs one is good.He's standing there grinning like a fecking idiot,barely managing to hold it together,then he finally loses it and bursts out laughing at the absurdity of the whole thing. ITV must have been racking their brains trying to come up with something dafter than those clips the BBC are playing between programmes just now. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ST SID Posted February 4, 2003 Report Share Posted February 4, 2003 Who does the song used for the BBC3 adds? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stu Posted February 4, 2003 Report Share Posted February 4, 2003 1. That s***e impersonator advertising the BBC's Xmas TV line up - not funny and never f'k'n off the telly Alistair McGowan is brilliant! A non political version of Rory Bremner Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
snudge Posted February 5, 2003 Report Share Posted February 5, 2003 alitair mcgowan, good impersonator, s***e jokes ;) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Howard Hughes in BlueSuedeShoes Posted February 5, 2003 Report Share Posted February 5, 2003 Okay, this goes against the thread but..... Favourite advert of recent years was the big bill poster Irn Bru advert with the cow saying "When I'm a burger I want to be washed down with Irn Bru". Classic stuff that eventually got banned due to Animal Rights activists having bugger all sense of humour. Sh*te telly adverts? The Fiat Uno one with the daft tosser poor excuse for a bloke saying "Don't you want me, baby?" when she locks the car doors then "WHOA, whoa w whoa!". Drive on, sweetheart. In fact, right into teh feckin' petrol pump and blevy everyone to smithereens like yeez feckin' deserve! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest bob_mcshug Posted February 9, 2003 Report Share Posted February 9, 2003 those f*ckin argos adverts too!! they are murder! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
paisleybuds Posted February 9, 2003 Report Share Posted February 9, 2003 Barcardi Adverts Bisto Advert Thats the only ones I can think of that are decent. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Sainty Posted February 10, 2003 Report Share Posted February 10, 2003 Cheap adverts like More store. I can't stand those blistex lips ads. The charity ads that show people in Africa. The home abuse ads. Grolsh. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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