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How Do You Spell That?


RickMcD

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A few of us went out from Bangor on a motor boat last week and landed at Carrickfergus. (King Billy did that once but not on a motor boat.) We had a few pints of ale and a late lunch in Wetherspoons and by the time we started heading back it was getting quite dark. The radio crackled to life and what followed I found quite interesting. A fishing boat named Wee Tom was calling the Belfast Coastguard which is actually based in Bangor. They had been fishing off The Gobbins on the County Antrim coast but now couldn't get their engine started. The messages then came something like this:-

'Wee Tom this is Belfast Coastguard. Say again'

'This is fishing boat Wee Tom. We're a mile and a half off the Gobbins and can't get our engine started. Out'.

OK. Wee Tom. Belfast Coastgurd. Are you in imminent danger?'

' Wee Tom , no. But it's getting quite dark. Been trying to start our engine for half an hour'

'Roger that, Wee Tom. Are you drifting?'

' No, our anchor is deployed'.

At that point a trawler came on line and said they could see Wee Tom but as they were on guard duty on the workings of new underwater pipe from Scotland to Ulster, they couldn't land Wee Tom's crew.

'Belfast Coastguard , did you copy that, Wee Tom?'

'Roger that. But we don't want to abandon our boat'

'Ok , Wee Tom. We will deploy Bangor Lifeboat'

Two of the blokes on our boat are RNLI men and their bleepers immediately burst into life so it was a quick reaction. Our boat was too far away and too slow to help. The next thing that went on had me in stitches.

'Wee Tom, Belfast Coastguard. Can you please spell Wee Tom phonetically'.

'Wee Tom. What? Oh aye give us a minute.'

'Wee Tom here. Whisky Echo Echo---------' Silence. Everybody on our boat, including me, was virtually chanting Tango Oscar Mike. Eventually the coast guard came back on and asked them to spell the name. Again all they got was Whisky Echo Echo. So the coastguard asked again for the spelling. And then came the reply.

'Aw f**k! It's just Wee Tom!'

'Roger that, Wee Tom. Belfast coastguard out.' Folk were laughing for miles around. Just as Bangor lifeboat was about to launch, Wee Tom's engine started so the coastguard monitored Wee Tom's progress into Bangor and when we reached Bangor the lifeboat was being winched back into the station. I enjoyed the whole episode.

Incidentally, there's a life-size statue of King Billy outside Carrickfergus Castle that was commissioned to mark the tercentenary of the 1690 landing. Apart from being pug-ugly, he was about four foot six tall if the statue was anything to go by. Orangemen don't like it. Everbody knows Billy was at least six foot six!

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