If You Were Offered The Job Tomorrow....

[kevo_smfc]

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Edited November 24, 2015 by kevo_smfc

[Stuart Dickson]

I'm enjoying this thread. The first thing anyone on here would have to do on getting the job would be to establish some credibility amongst the players and on here we've seen that the way some forumsters would do that is to sit down with the players and tell them why they aren't good enough to wear coloured boots. No science, no logic, no injury statistics just your opinion. One of the players you're going to be sitting down in front of has 16 Scotland caps, another was capped for the Republic of Ireland, another has a Scotland B cap, and several others are or were Scotland Under 21 internationalists, some of them have even have an EBT FFS! And you're planning to tell them they aren't good enough whilst showing them the badge you got for being one of the four subs for your BB team competing and coming 5th in the local five-a-side competition where 6 teams took part. You've got to love a football forum.....

[Lord Pityme]

Aye Murray said they would be training Sundays... He also said we had good players, he would add to that, we would see improved performances and be challenging for promotion. So far I haven't seen evidence to back any of this up.

But I have seen him give the players more time off, when its obvious the players, and him need more time to work on our deficiencies!

[Seaside Nipper]

Our home form is so bad I would change the match day preparation.

Instead of the players sauntering in to the stadium at various times by their own transport, I would get them to meet at Ralston to start the match briefing and get changed there. The squad would then travel by coach to the stadium to create some sort of arrival event in front of the main stand at say 2.15. Bit of external PA kit to do some interviews, sign autographs for the kids, give out a few freebies, etc. Seen it done at Man City (I know we are not them) where the whole thing generates a buzz and creates something out of nothing.

Hopefully would result in team arriving ready for the game in hand as well as giving a focal point for fans, especially kids, to turn up earlier. Same could be done in reverse at 5pm on way back if successful.

Cost a few hundred quid per match but hopefully improve results and create some decent local/community PR. Away form is generally better so there may be something in it.

Just a thought, we need to do something. Worth a try?

That really grinds my gears, its such a lacklustre approach to a team game, it just smacks of a lack of professionalism. You are right it should be a pre venue meet, prep, dine, and then arrive as one , as a team, at least it would demonstrate some kind of joined up team approach even if collectively we are a crock of shit at present, at least the players would look like they were a unit, even if they all cannae get to the back seats on the bus !!

[oaksoft]

I'm enjoying this thread. The first thing anyone on here would have to do on getting the job would be to establish some credibility amongst the players and on here we've seen that the way some forumsters would do that is to sit down with the players and tell them why they aren't good enough to wear coloured boots. No science, no logic, no injury statistics just your opinion. One of the players you're going to be sitting down in front of has 16 Scotland caps, another was capped for the Republic of Ireland, another has a Scotland B cap, and several others are or were Scotland Under 21 internationalists, some of them have even have an EBT FFS! And you're planning to tell them they aren't good enough whilst showing them the badge you got for being one of the four subs for your BB team competing and coming 5th in the local five-a-side competition where 6 teams took part. You've got to love a football forum.....

of COURSE you are being critical of everyone else. yiu are totally incapable of being anything else.

here is a wee thought. why not bugger off and leave saints fans to discuss saints issues?

i know this is a real shock for you but nobody on here gives two f**ks what you think.

#tallpoppysyndrome

#thichasfcuk

Edited November 24, 2015 by oaksoft

[TediousTom]

Good thread this, inviting our forum user's to actually say what should be done rather than just the "KTF" or the "No bloody good enough Murray". I like it, like it indeed.

Now my plan to re-ignite the Buddies is as follows

1) Accept the job

2) Appoint Tom Hendrie as my no.2

3) Appoint the Hawk as a coach and hang out with him on my days off

4) Have the hall of fame fully updated, leaving space for me.

5) Hire a theatre at the Showcase, Linwood for three days and spend that time making the player's watch "The bubble didnae burst".

6) Play a 4-3-3 akin to the 1999 - 2000 team.

7) Change the caterer's to someone who can actually make a decent pie.

8) Have stronger bovril, I want to see bits of bone floating in it.

9) Instruct the car parking staff to actually let car's out of the car park.

10) Employ some scouts, not boy scouts but scouts to find boys.

I do realise I was asked for a 5 point plan but I give you my 10 point path to glory.

Once the Buddies have accepted me and started the expected hero worship enjoyed by the likes of Mr Fitzpatrick I would use my new found influence to further improve all things Paisley football related by

11) Bribing Div (by allowing him to meet me) to remove StuDick and LordLookAtMe from this forum

12) Get the caterer to sell Pasties, I like pasties.

13) Every month I would give one of the travel clubs free hospitality for two for them to raffle or auction to there members (a small gesture but an easy way to help them raise much needed funds).

14) Make injured player's travel to away games on travel club buses, thus buying an extra seat and making the journey more attractive for adulent fans.

15) Make Alan Picken my very own official photographer for the autographed photies I will sell you all.

16) Go round Paisley on a random matchday with a loudspeaker making statements such us "your club needs you" and "come see us play for Paisley".

17) Like Frankie Boyle is with Kerry Katona I would be like that with Scott Brown. In every interview I ever give I will make reference to hime having a "weasal face". For example "yes my players were unlucky today but we acted with dignity, unlike Scott Brown who has a weasal face"

That will do for now!

Edited November 24, 2015 by TediousTom

[RickMcD]

Enjoying this thread. The variety of posts ( some making good suggestions , some very funny, some plain crazy) is one of the main reasons why I love this forum. It's like a drug I can't resist. Or maybe booze even. For what it's worth, when Murray was appointed my first reaction was that he would have problems with the senior players. And when he came out with the Sunday thing in the press before he had even met most of the players I thought it was a gigantic boob. If he really thought the Sunday thing was a winner, it still made sense to tell the players first and try to convince them. There seems to have been an undercurrent of dissatisfaction emanating from the senior players for a few years now which should have been hit on the head a long time ago. Or is that just a nasty rumour?

Does the club use a sports psychologist? That's a genuine question. Some of our players seem to me to have the skill to perform much better but they freeze on the day. I'm not suggesting a psychologist would solve all the problems but if I was made manager I would certainly look at the possibility of using one.

[shull]

Enjoying this thread. The variety of posts ( some making good suggestions , some very funny, some plain crazy) is one of the main reasons why I love this forum. It's like a drug I can't resist. Or maybe booze even. For what it's worth, when Murray was appointed my first reaction was that he would have problems with the senior players. And when he came out with the Sunday thing in the press before he had even met most of the players I thought it was a gigantic boob. If he really thought the Sunday thing was a winner, it still made sense to tell the players first and try to convince them. There seems to have been an undercurrent of dissatisfaction emanating from the senior players for a few years now which should have been hit on the head a long time ago. Or is that just a nasty rumour?

Does the club use a sports psychologist? That's a genuine question. Some of our players seem to me to have the skill to perform much better but they freeze on the day. I'm not suggesting a psychologist would solve all the problems but if I was made manager I would certainly look at the possibility of using one.

It 's the fans who are f*cking mental and in the need of help.

Watching the shite on offer for years on end and many decades for some.

COYS

[saintnextlifetime]

1. Finishing

2. ball retention

3. crossing

4. fitness

5. moral

I assume the current assistant will be good enough

Yes basics like that and more . .

How to trap a ball . .

How to pass a ball . . this would include short passes that gradually increase in distance so that competence can be achieved . .

How to keep the ball on the ground . .

How to header a ball. .

How you kick the ball when you see a scoring opportunity

How to recognise a goal opportunity

How to defend set pieces and how to use set pieces to your own advantage

How to tackle an opponent as early as possible instead of waiting until he is in your own half or your own penalty box

The best form of defence is always attack , always take the game to the other team ESPECIALLY at Home , in front of the Home crowd

Also , no silly haircuts allowed - all players must be trained to header a ball that is wet and muddy. .

[Seaside Nipper]

Good thread this, inviting our forum user's to actually say what should be done rather than just the "KTF" of the "No bloody good enough Murray". I like it, like it indeed.

Now my plan to re-ignite the Buddies is as follows

1) Accept the job

2) Appoint Tom Hendrie as my no.2

3) Appoint the Hawk as a coach and hang out with him on my days off

4) Have the hall of fame fully updated, leaving space for me.

5) Hire a theatre at the Showcase, Linwood for three days and spend that time making the player's watch "The bubble didnae burst".

6) Play a 4-3-3 akin to the 1999 - 2000 team.

7) Change the caterer's to someone who can actually make a decent pie.

8) Have stronger bovril, I want to see bits of bone floating in it.

9) Instruct the car parking staff to actually let car's out of the car park.

10) Employ some scouts, not boy scouts but scouts to find boys.

I do realise I was asked for a 5 point plan but I give you my 10 point path to glory.

A dib dib dib would just about do it

[Brian1877]

Good thread this, inviting our forum user's to actually say what should be done rather than just the "KTF" or the "No bloody good enough Murray". I like it, like it indeed.

Now my plan to re-ignite the Buddies is as follows

1) Accept the job

2) Appoint Tom Hendrie as my no.2

3) Appoint the Hawk as a coach and hang out with him on my days off

4) Have the hall of fame fully updated, leaving space for me.

5) Hire a theatre at the Showcase, Linwood for three days and spend that time making the player's watch "The bubble didnae burst".

6) Play a 4-3-3 akin to the 1999 - 2000 team.

7) Change the caterer's to someone who can actually make a decent pie.

8) Have stronger bovril, I want to see bits of bone floating in it.

9) Instruct the car parking staff to actually let car's out of the car park.

10) Employ some scouts, not boy scouts but scouts to find boys.

I do realise I was asked for a 5 point plan but I give you my 10 point path to glory.

Once the Buddies have accepted me and started the expected hero worship enjoyed by the likes of Mr Fitzpatrick I would use my new found influence to further improve all things Paisley football related by

11) Bribing Div (by allowing him to meet me) to remove StuDick and LordLookAtMe from this forum

12) Get the caterer to sell Pasties, I like pasties.

13) Every month I would give one of the travel clubs free hospitality for two for them to raffle or auction to there members (a small gesture but an easy way to help them raise much needed funds).

14) Make injured player's travel to away games on travel club buses, thus buying an extra seat and making the journey more attractive for adulent fans.

15) Make Alan Picken my very own official photographer for the autographed photies I will sell you all.

16) Go round Paisley on a random matchday with a loudspeaker making statements such us "your club needs you" and "come see us play for Paisley".

17) Like Frankie Boyle is with Kerry Katona I would be like that with Scott Brown. In every interview I ever give I will make reference to hime having a "weasal face". For example "yes my players were unlucky today but we acted with dignity, unlike Scott Brown who has a weasal face"

That will do for now!

Surely it was a 3-5-2 formation in the memorable Tom Hendrie 99-00 season.

Nicolson and Ross were wing backs. no?

[Flareybob]

I would fine the team a weeks wages

[proudtobeabuddy]

I would give an in depth team talk that would go something like... "Score more goals than the other team and don't let any in".

[TediousTom]

Surely it was a 3-5-2 formation in the memorable Tom Hendrie 99-00 season.

Nicolson and Ross were wing backs. no?

My recollection was a 4 - 3 - 3 with both fullbacks bombing on, switching play and being altogether excellent.

That said Tom Hendrie is my assistant for a reason!

[shull]

I would appoint Ian Murray to be my Co -Manager.

That might upset St Mirren's greatest ever supporter.

Job done, I would then stand down and leave Murray to it.

Hee hee

[Mykey]

I'd be right up for that, programme could even have a centre spread of Santa sitting in a rocking chair with the caption "you do know I'm not real, but football is".

There was a man that knew - If you want to be the best in the world at what you do - wear black boots

[Stuart Dickson]

My recollection was a 4 - 3 - 3 with both fullbacks bombing on, switching play and being altogether excellent.

That said Tom Hendrie is my assistant for a reason!

3-4-3

Turner played as sweeper behind McLaughlan and Walker. Up front Yardley and Lavety played centrally with Mendes playing wide left typically. Ross and Nicolson were wide players - I guess most akin to wing backs but they were often so advanced it would be easier to class them as wide midfielders.

According to Jose Quitongo Hendrie liked to keep his players in for a couple of hours in the afternoon to go over tactics and individual duties lecturing like a school teacher. He remembers the Hendrie period fondly but classes him as "crazy" for going over the same things over and over again. It clearly worked though. Another Hendrie thing Jose told me about was the breakfast club. Hendrie decided all players would come in for 8am for training and they were all to bring in healthy breakfasts to eat under supervision. Jose travelled with Mark Yardley and Ian Ross and he told me the consequence of the breakfast club was that the three of them became very acquainted with Greggs often stopping for a sausage roll and a yum yum on their way in before breakfast.

Edited November 24, 2015 by Stuart Dickson

[Howard Hughes in BlueSuedeShoes]

If I were to take on the Saints job tomorrow I'd do the decent thing and bow to fan pressure by resigning before the weekend.....

[Hambud]

I would order Mullen to change wings frequently during a game ( no hiding )

I would order Shankland "jumping" lessons

I would fine every player who didnt control a simple pass he received

I would order clangers to concentrate on his goal keeping duties and stop messing af**kinbout

I would order a fifth order if i could think of one right now

who is this Mullan chap?

[Kemp]

6) Play a 4-3-3 akin to the 1999 - 2000 team.

3-4-3