Julian Banjos

Crawford Fairbrother (high jumper) Kenneth McKellar (tenor) and of course Alex McLeish to name but three Neilsonians not to mention Sky Sports golf link man David Livingstone. Ex Neilsonian (asked to leave)

Fair play to you Tom. Even though you're stinking, I've always known that you're one of the good guys.

I use E-Mule and it's great. Yo Never heard of Torrent-Spy.

Human Resources. Aaaaarghhhhhhhh.....

1. Teenage Kicks 2. True Confessions 3. There Goes Norman 4. Hypnotised 5. Male Model Did you know that 'Teenage Kicks' is actually about masturbation? The original chorus was 'I wanna hold it, hold it tight, get teenage kicks right through the night.' Trooo. Obviously, this was unlikely to make it onto TOTP so a change was required.

1. Franz Ferdinand - Michael 2. Britney Spears - Toxic ( Belter of a pop tune! ) 3. The Undertones - Teenage Kicks 4. The Stands - Here She Comes Again 5. Joy Division - Interzone

Sid Vicious

Sounds like an interesting thread to me too! I read in the Saints magazine that after we got the money from the Ferguson deal, we were looking at signing an up and coming lower league player from England. The team was Crewe Alexandra, the player was David Platt. One that got away eh? He soon after went to Villa and scored for England in World Cup '90. Others that come to mind are Jorge Cadete, Bebeto, Paul Kitson, Benito Carbone, Marco Negri and of course Ronaldinho. They were all within the same week as well. Ronaldhino Story;

1. Cracker 2. This Life 3. Prime Suspect 4. Our Friends In The North 5. The Manageress Okay I was taking the piss with the last one!! Does anyone remember it though? I'm sure that Charlie Nic was in one of the episodes when he was playing for Arsenal. Ear-ring and all.

A man buys several sheep, hoping to breed them for wool. After several weeks, he notices that none of the sheep are getting pregnant, and phones a vet for help. The vet tells him that he should try artificial insemination. The farmer doesn't have the slightest idea what this means but, not wanting to display his ignorance, only asks the vet how he will know when the sheep are pregnant. The vet tells him that they will stop standing around and instead will lie down and wallow in grass when they are pregnant. The man hangs up and gives it some thought. He comes to the conclusion that artificial insemination means he has to impregnate the sheep himself. So, he loads the sheep into his Land Rover, drives them out into the woods, has sex with them all, brings them back, and goes to bed. Next morning, he wakes and looks out at the sheep. Seeing that they are all still standing around, he deduces that the first try didn't take, and loads them in the Land Rover again. He drives them out to the woods, bangs each sheep twice for good measure, brings them back, and goes to bed exhausted. Next morning, he wakes to find the sheep still just standing round. Try again. he tells himself, and proceeds to load them up, and drive them out to the woods. He spends all day shagging the sheep and upon returning home, falls listlessly into bed. The next morning, he cannot even raise himself from the bed to look out of the window. He asks his wife to look, and tell him if the sheep are lying in the grass. No, she says, they're all in the Land Rover, and one of them is beeping the horn.

Frankly, Mr Shankly, since you ask you are a flatulent pain the arse I do not mean to be so rude but still, I must speak frankly, Mr Shankly

1. Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee (Joe Miller) 2. Baldy baldy baldy baldy (Paul Jack) 3. We've got 10000 seats and you've no'! (Brockville) 4. He's fat, he's round, he's worth a million pound, Lavety Lavety! 5. Easy easy easy easy easy easy (bewilder the **** as we go 4-1 down at Castle Greyskull)