RickMcD

I've always regarded you as reasonably bright and semi-amusing at times but I'll never understand why you don't ignore Dicko. I think most of us do by now. I only see some of his trash because guys like you keep quoting him.

I heard there was a lot of swelling but they didn't mention it because the guy quite liked the look of it and wanted it left alone.

I'm a bit claustrophobic and the pictures of those tunnels give me the creeps. The old tunnels at Tynecastle used to bug me. Even worse they flowed with piss.

Funny how sometimes a word can crop up you've not heard in a while and then you hear it several times again quite soon afterwards. Kayak. Last Thursday morning I was in Birkenhead to get the Belfast ferry and a guy turned up whose only piece of hand luggage was a kayak that must have been about 15 feet long. It was a hoot seeing the check-in girl's face. She didn't have a clue what to say but the guy got permission to carry on. But because it was hand luggage the blokes that load the trailers for luggage pointed out he would have to take the kayak on the bus that takes foot passengers over to the ship. Now buses aren't designed to take fifteen foot canoes and it was hilarious watching them trying to fit it in. Eventually they managed and the bloke actually sat beside me with the kayak filling virtually the whole passage. I asked him did he know lifeboats were supplied on board but I don't think he was too amused. When we got to Belfast the bus that comes on board for foot passengers is a rinky-dink wee thing and it looked impossible to get it in. But after a lot of four letter words, they somehow managed. Anyhow, I digress. In an earlier post, Sonny, you rightly said this is the only show in town. How long do we piss about waiting on a shiny white knight? This is as near as we are likely to get and he's a genuine fan. I know some guys genuinely can't afford £12 a month but I don't understand how guys who can comfortably afford it won't do it. This might well be the last chance we get. For less than the price of a beer per week we have a chance to secure the long term future of Saint Mirren. There's an old aphorism about f**kups developing when good men do nothing. Do something positive. Sitting on the sidelines waiting for a perfect solution is achieving eff all. I'm signed up, by the way.

Living in Northern Ireland, I often get asked the same. And I give the same answer and if I happen to have a couple of jars in me I quite often add where both bloody mobs should f**k off to. I am trying awfy hard to stop myself wanting mayhem and a blood-bath on Sunday. Honest, I am trying!

Years ago I worked in Glasgow with a bloke whose I used to work with a guy with the Christian name David but his brother's Christian name was Alison. How the hell could their parents do that? The lad did have problems with it.

Gene Krupa.

Has he got a goat?

I reckon that of Brits who watch television I would be somewhere among the 5% who watch least. Take sport out of that and I could well be about the1% mark. Doesn't make me a better person. I do think it's a bit odd to simply make a decision not to watch at all. But, hey, there's nowt as queer as some folk.

Is it to save you the price of a licence or do you magnanimously allow your loved ones to look at your old black and white Bush?

You seem to have confirmed my long held view that you're a drama queen.

Dunno, it could be his middle name, but what a friend! Why are Jews still allowed to tell Jewish jokes? I know they're brilliant at it but when anybody else tells stories with even the tiniest hint of anything that could just possibly be regarded as racist, the roof falls in.

A friend of mine lives in a very salubrious part of Newton Mearns which because of the ethnicity of many of it's residents is known as the Golan Heights. So it figures.

Could you run that by me again? I've often had good natured banter with England fans- I still do over here- but I can't for the life of me see where even knuckle-- dragging England fans should enter the Scottish independence argument. Rangers and Celtic ain't going south.

Is it the valleys and the hills or their bonny blooming rose? What's not to like? Hatred has always been a factor in the Scottish independence movement.

Tend to agree but admit if I was one of those having to flit I suppose I would be a bit peed off. Something that can't be denied, though, is that our BoD have elevated cack-handedness to a new level. Maybe for the last time? 4th. place isn't likely for us but it's still a remote possibility but imagine us going into that game needing three points and having that bloody mob there. If they asked nice, would our bored board let them sing the Sash?

Good stuff! I assume it was coincidence that your new job was just above the jobby thread on the menu.

I certainly blame Ford for shooting that nice boy Jesse James. You know my question was a bit tongue in cheek and it does depend on how you look at it. Henry Ford shouldn't get the blame for traffic accidents. That's down to the first guy that harnessed his horse or coos to a wagon. Or maybe we should blame whoever invented the wheel. Would he qualify as a scientist or an inventor? What's the differenc?

Ain't gonna look it up but possibly it was me that first brought up old Adolf's name first. Only to remind you and others that not only Christians started crusades. And my comment certainly didn't stop the debate. Can I ask you a question? Have scientists killed more human beings than all the despotic rulers who ever lifted foot?

You're being very generous to an awfy lot of people if you really mean what you say in your third sentence. Or does your wee smiley yellow thingy negate it. As for Oaky, as the actress said to the bishop, 'Are you in or oot?'

I give in, what does crement mean? And where is Bluto when we need him? Especially when we're talking shit.

Certainly wasn't a JFK moment for me either but such an early demise is regrettable even in an ex-Rangers player. No doubt I'll get some rebuttals. My only JFK moment among guys who were still playing was the great Scotland and Spurs player John White.

Wonder why the Beeb decided to feature this now. Was it some kind of anniversary of his? He was a strange guy and if what I've heard is true, what he said to Fitzy was bang out of order. I was quite friendly with Colin Jackson back then and he always said that Cooper was a bit weird. He refused to be interviewed because he hated hearing himself afterwards 'because it made him sound so Scottish'. Hell, most of us don't like hearing ourselves. Especially when we talk shit. I do think he was a very good player,though, despite what a few on here have said. If a player like him was around now he would be an automatic selection for Scotland and would be playing in the EPL. I remember an evening game at Ibrox years ago when for the first eighty minutes I could have played better than him and then he destroyed us single handed in the last ten minutes. Bastard! I had no idea he was a religious bigot.

Yep, I reckon he's one stubborn sob, because there have been quite a few posts recently that must have had him almost returning to us. But going on about 'grammar', as Faraway, BuddieinEK and Slarti have done doesn't help. To some of those of a certain vintage, and I'm getting close, Grammar suggests a certain educational establishment in Old Paisley which, to paraphrase Burns, was 'that school that nane surpasses, for poncey guys and bonnie lasses'. Mention of the Grammar gets Bluto twitching like Warden Hodges spotting a light. Bluto's good lady probably has to tie him down to stop him reaching for his keypad. Message to Bluto. Come back, we all miss you. Well, most of us do. Some of us do. Maybe a handful of guys. I kind of miss you. Haste ye back. OK, suit yersel!

All the very best. Remember what the great, late atheist Dave Allen always used to say- 'May your God go with you'. He also used to say 'I'm an atheist, thank God'.