An Incomplete List of Things More Capable of Running the Country than the Current Government
By Brian Bilston
A bollard. A thimble. A beef gravy granule.
A plectrum. A bilge pump. A Pokemon annual.
A doorknob. A chaffinch. A bowl of cold porridge.
A footbath. A clothes peg. A postcard from Norwich.
A wine stain. A puddle. A spoon. Rupert Grint.
A discarded tissue. A lanyard. Some lint.
A used toner cartridge. Some musical socks.
A build up of silt. A stuffed startled fox.
A plimsoll. A wingnut. A set of false teeth.
A novelty wall clock with the face of Prue Leith.
A beetle. A bunion. An old piece of string.
A plant pot. A bog roll. Some stuff. Anything.