Callum Gilhooley Posted July 24, 2015 Report Share Posted July 24, 2015 Has anyone laid artificial turf? I'm considering this as can't be arsed with the fortnightly grass cutting ritual. I was on holiday earlier this year and the hotel had a sunbathing area that was artificial turf and was top quality. Suggestions/prices? Just pour Whisky on it . That way it`ll come up half cut. Every year i managed to trot this oldie out & every year it makes me laugh , but then I`m a simple soul. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
faraway saint Posted July 24, 2015 Author Report Share Posted July 24, 2015 Just pour Whisky on it . That way it`ll come up half cut. Every year i managed to trot this oldie out & every year it makes me laugh , but then I`m a simple soul. Agreed. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Isle Of Bute Saint Posted July 24, 2015 Report Share Posted July 24, 2015 The stuff melts on heat waves so you should be OK then. You should go the full wag and install plastic flowers word has it they bloom all year round Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
faraway saint Posted July 24, 2015 Author Report Share Posted July 24, 2015 The stuff melts on heat waves so you should be OK then. You should go the full wag and install plastic flowers word has it they bloom all year round You're funny.......................... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
faraway saint Posted July 24, 2015 Author Report Share Posted July 24, 2015 (edited) Quote was changed to £1400, waiting on another quote from another company. I'll ask about the grass melting in heatwaves, I won't sound daft, will I? Edited July 25, 2015 by faraway saint Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
salmonbuddie Posted July 25, 2015 Report Share Posted July 25, 2015 Normal? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
faraway saint Posted July 25, 2015 Author Report Share Posted July 25, 2015 One of the companies who I had e-mailed for a quote got back asking for my telephone number to "discuss" this. Naw, yer ok mate, at this stage it's only a general enquiry, don't need some sales numpty trying to persuade me to buy something I might not want. They then want my address to send some samples......................please let it be artificial turf samples. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shull Posted July 25, 2015 Report Share Posted July 25, 2015 One of the companies who I had e-mailed for a quote got back asking for my telephone number to "discuss" this. Naw, yer ok mate, at this stage it's only a general enquiry, don't need some sales numpty trying to persuade me to buy something I might not want. They then want my address to send some samples......................please let it be artificial turf samples. One of those free samples wid dae my windae box. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
civilsaint Posted July 26, 2015 Report Share Posted July 26, 2015 One of those samples got flung over Chris Froome. Don't think your window box would appreciate. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
iTony Posted July 26, 2015 Report Share Posted July 26, 2015 (edited) Has anyone laid artificial turf? I'm considering this as can't be arsed with the fortnightly grass cutting ritual. I was on holiday earlier this year and the hotel had a sunbathing area that was artificial turf and was top quality. Suggestions/prices? Just remember, when you're having one of your famous "parties" in your garden you don't end up with burns on your hands, knees and arse. Quality thread man, just quality! Edited July 26, 2015 by iTony Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
iTony Posted July 28, 2015 Report Share Posted July 28, 2015 I showed this thread to my Brother-in-law who works with one other guy doing all kinds of work in gardens and they both have experience of laying artificial turf. After scolding me for mocking the inflicted, he said he and his business partner would be willing to drive up and do work for you at decent "mates rates" as you (allegedly) support St. Mirren. As you claim to have me on "ignore", you won't read this will you so there really was no need for me to type this and you'll never know if they could have given you a good quote. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
faraway saint Posted July 29, 2015 Author Report Share Posted July 29, 2015 I now have about 10 samples of this artificial turf, kindly delivered yesterday, although I didn't ask for them. TBH it's quite interesting, ranges from stuff that's like a cheap doormat to pretty reasonable stuff. I'd really need to see a full lawn before making any decision. Need to clear out the e-mails, they are getting quite persistent, time to make it clear where I am in this, nowhere close to making a decision ya bunch of wallopers! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shull Posted July 29, 2015 Report Share Posted July 29, 2015 I now have about 10 samples of this artificial turf, kindly delivered yesterday, although I didn't ask for them. TBH it's quite interesting, ranges from stuff that's like a cheap doormat to pretty reasonable stuff. I'd really need to see a full lawn before making any decision. Need to clear out the e-mails, they are getting quite persistent, time to make it clear where I am in this, nowhere close to making a decision ya bunch of wallopers! I could do with a new doormat. Eh ? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
faraway saint Posted July 29, 2015 Author Report Share Posted July 29, 2015 I could do with a new doormat. Eh ? I'll pass your details onto them, be prepared for lots of new friends. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HSS Posted July 29, 2015 Report Share Posted July 29, 2015 I now have about 10 samples of this artificial turf, kindly delivered yesterday, although I didn't ask for them. TBH it's quite interesting, ranges from stuff that's like a cheap doormat to pretty reasonable stuff. I'd really need to see a full lawn before making any decision. Need to clear out the e-mails, they are getting quite persistent, time to make it clear where I am in this, nowhere close to making a decision ya bunch of wallopers! How many samples would you need to complete the job? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
faraway saint Posted July 29, 2015 Author Report Share Posted July 29, 2015 How many samples would you need to complete the job? After a quick calculation..................257. Would look a bit patchy right enough. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shull Posted July 29, 2015 Report Share Posted July 29, 2015 I need 1 for a doormat. And half of 1 for my windae box. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bluto Posted July 29, 2015 Report Share Posted July 29, 2015 After a quick calculation..................257. Would look a bit patchy right enough. Have you considered asking farmer John to supply a quote? I believe he may have a wee bit of turf that could be purchased. And as for delivery... ? HSS would be amenable.... Surely? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HSS Posted July 29, 2015 Report Share Posted July 29, 2015 Have you considered asking farmer John to supply a quote? I believe he may have a wee bit of turf that could be purchased. And as for delivery... ? HSS would be amenable.... Surely? There is quite often a smell of grass in my Cab.It seems to be the punters fave drug at the moment. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
faraway saint Posted July 29, 2015 Author Report Share Posted July 29, 2015 Have you considered asking farmer John to supply a quote? I believe he may have a wee bit of turf that could be purchased. And as for delivery... ? HSS would be amenable.... Surely? That's nice, although the word "artificial" could well scupper your brilliant idea. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bluto Posted July 29, 2015 Report Share Posted July 29, 2015 (edited) That's nice, although the word "artificial" could well scupper your brilliant idea. You're no thinking laterally.Prior to dispatch, fj could microwave it (thus rendering it bug free and sterile), then he could slap a coat of lacquer on it. Bosh-bosh. Job done. Sorted. Edited July 29, 2015 by bluto Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
faraway saint Posted July 29, 2015 Author Report Share Posted July 29, 2015 You're no thinking laterally. Prior to dispatch, fj could microwave it (thus rendering it bug free and sterile), then he could slap a coat of lacquer on it. Bosh-bosh. Job done. Sorted. Great idea, I'm onto the patenting office right now, cheers. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest TPAFKATS Posted July 29, 2015 Report Share Posted July 29, 2015 After a quick calculation..................257. Would look a bit patchy right enough. Patchy would be a lot more realistic. Just get 3 or 4 longer pieces to indicate where all the dugs pish and it'll look just like the real thing. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bluto Posted July 29, 2015 Report Share Posted July 29, 2015 Patchy would be a lot more realistic. Just get 3 or 4 longer pieces to indicate where all the dugs pish and it'll look just like the real thing. Or just get fj to apply a lighter lacquer to some of the silly sods... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shull Posted July 29, 2015 Report Share Posted July 29, 2015 There is quite often a smell of grass in my Cab.It seems to be the punters fave drug at the moment.My Cab also, and it really is a horrible and disgusting aroma. I assume the Junkies realise that when I hit the button to put the windows down. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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