RickMcD Posted August 30, 2014 Report Share Posted August 30, 2014 I don't know if this counts but I found this funny. From Anneka Rice (her with the helicopter ass) on her radio show this morning. Folk were texting in with old phrases and sayings they used to hear. One woman came up with her granny's favourite. 'We all make mistakes', said the hedgehog climbing off the hairbrush. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shull Posted September 1, 2014 Author Report Share Posted September 1, 2014 nugget spangle nugget spangle nae neck blow up doll great thread great post smiley smiley smiley 2-0 goals by well said boss and smokey your a star You made this earlier ? Good yin Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shull Posted September 12, 2014 Author Report Share Posted September 12, 2014 A wee story in the paper today and it wisnae the deaf bit that made me chuckle. ' Cops told a hard of hearing porn fan to turn his TV down in Rubi, Spain. ' Lol Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
faraway saint Posted September 12, 2014 Report Share Posted September 12, 2014 A wee story in the paper today and it wisnae the deaf bit that made me chuckle. ' Cops told a hard of hearing porn fan to turn his TV down in Rubi, Spain. ' Lol Did you turn it down? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shull Posted September 12, 2014 Author Report Share Posted September 12, 2014 Whit ? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
faraway saint Posted September 12, 2014 Report Share Posted September 12, 2014 Whit ? The porn ya trumpet! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shull Posted September 12, 2014 Author Report Share Posted September 12, 2014 Eh ? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
faraway saint Posted September 12, 2014 Report Share Posted September 12, 2014 Eh ? FFS' Ah gie up! Somebody help him. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shull Posted September 12, 2014 Author Report Share Posted September 12, 2014 Cannae hear you, wait till i turn the heavy breathing noise doon. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shull Posted September 12, 2014 Author Report Share Posted September 12, 2014 Why shout ? I'm no corn beef. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shull Posted September 12, 2014 Author Report Share Posted September 12, 2014 Whit ? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
insaintee Posted September 12, 2014 Report Share Posted September 12, 2014 Unfunny thread for this shit Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shull Posted September 12, 2014 Author Report Share Posted September 12, 2014 No my fault. It's aw doon to Dunderheid and Smartifartblast. I'm away tae get my ears syringed. Whit ? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
faraway saint Posted September 14, 2014 Report Share Posted September 14, 2014 (edited) I was at the Stand comedy club last night. Plenty of funny there. I was hilarious. Edited September 14, 2014 by faraway saint Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
insaintee Posted September 16, 2014 Report Share Posted September 16, 2014 I was at the Stand comedy club last night. Plenty of funny there. I was pished hilarious. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shull Posted September 21, 2014 Author Report Share Posted September 21, 2014 So basically what you're actually saying is, you're part of the majority... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shull Posted May 24, 2016 Author Report Share Posted May 24, 2016 Two men were driving a truck around with a penguin. A traffic cop noticed the penguin and stopped the truckand told the driver to take bird to a zoo right away. The next day, the same cop saw the same two men in the same truck with the penguin again. He stopped them and said, "Didn't I tell you guys to take this bird to a zoo yesterday?" And the driver said "We did exactly that officer! and today we're taking him to the pictures." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Buffs Posted May 24, 2016 Report Share Posted May 24, 2016 Joey Barton signs for The R*ng*rs. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
whydowebother Posted May 24, 2016 Report Share Posted May 24, 2016 Joey Barton signs for The R*ng*rs. It's the 'funny' thread not the 'fanny' thread Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stlucifer Posted May 27, 2016 Report Share Posted May 27, 2016 (edited) It's the 'funny' thread not the 'fanny' thread His interview might be a classic if he tries to "speak our language". Also. An Aberdonian went to hospital as his wife was due to give birth. Upon arriving the nurse met him and asked him to sit down. He was a bit worried but the nurse said to him, "Congratulations. Your wife has just given birth to quintuplets, five big baby boys". I'm not surprised", said the Aberdonian, "I have a c*ck the size of a chimney"! The nurse replied, "You best get that cleaned then, They're all black"!!!! Edited May 27, 2016 by stlucifer Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shull Posted December 2, 2016 Author Report Share Posted December 2, 2016 I was standing at the bar one night, minding my own business, when this fat, ugly woman came up behind me, grabbed my behind and said, "You're kind'a cute. You gotta phone number?" I said, "Yeah, you gotta pen?" She said, "Yeah, I got a pen." I said, "You better get back in it before the farmer misses you." Cost me 6 stitches ... ***************************** I asked, "Give me 3 packets of condoms, please." Lady Cashier: "Do you need a paper bag with that, sir?" I said, "Nah... She's pretty good lookin'..." Cost me a busted tooth ... ***************************** I was talking to a young woman in the bar last night. She said, "If you lost a few pounds, had a shave and got your hair cut, you'd look all right." I said, "If I did that, I'd be talking to your friends over there instead of you." Cost me a fat lip ... ***************************** I was telling a woman in the pub about my ability to guess what day a woman was born just by feeling her breasts. "Really," she said, pushing out her ample chest with a smile, "then go ahead and try." After about thirty seconds of me fondling her breasts, the woman lost patience and said, "Come on, what day was I born?" I said, "Yesterday." Cost me a kick in the groin. ******************************************************* I went to the pub last night and saw a BIG woman dancing on a table. "Good legs!" I said! The girl giggled and said, "Do you really think so?" I said, "Hell, yes! Most tables would have collapsed by now." Cost me another 6 stitches ... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shull Posted March 20, 2017 Author Report Share Posted March 20, 2017 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
East Lothian Saint Posted March 23, 2017 Report Share Posted March 23, 2017 Guy goes to the doctors with a steering wheel stuck on his manhood.Doctor says ''is that painful'' ?Guys says ...''aye, it's driving me nuts'' Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
East Lothian Saint Posted March 23, 2017 Report Share Posted March 23, 2017 Post Number That must be worth a laugh Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shull Posted April 8, 2017 Author Report Share Posted April 8, 2017 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.